Empire Total War? What the hell? Didn’t this game come out like a year ago or something? Let me check…March 3, 2009! Whoa! This game must be twenty bucks by now, right? Let me check…No way! Fifty bucks still! Wake me up again in another 199 days. At LonePlacebo, you see, a game review is never to late. Tetris, anyone?
This game review is no ordinary game review. Sure, it’s fantastically written like always, but you’ll notice something different. Is it the font? No. Is it how friggin long it is in comparison with 90% of this website? Kind of. I know you are dying from anticipation. The inability to figure out this enigma must be eating away at your appendix. That’s right! It’s written by LonePlacebo’s first ever employee! He goes by the tentative pen name of “Sahin the Falcon.” (Don’t ask me) He specializes in everything and will hopefully continue to produce some more Pulitzer-worthy articles for this website in the future. Proceed to the article and make your judgment.